Thursday, April 11, 2013

CAREER MEMORIES - #7 MY LIFE CHANGED FOR THE BETTER IN D.C.!

I’ll never forget the Valentine’s week of 1982 that Wendy and I spent together when she arrived from Minneapolis. It was a personal vacation time off from work for me  and we did so much together including sight-seeing all of the historical sites around Washington, DC as well as in Maryland and Virginia. During this time, I also found out how competitive she was when we decided to play a round of miniature golf. Wendy absolutely throttled me and I was trying my best to beat her! At this golf outing is where the initials “HW” and “HJ” came about. I started calling Wendy “Honey” from the very onset when we met as she did to me. When it came time to fill out the golf scorecards, Wendy looked up at me and said “since we don’t refer to each other by our first names and only by ‘honey’, how about if we call ourselves HJ (Honey Jim) and HW (Honey Wendy)? Those initials are still spoken 100% of the time today as they were 31-years ago!

As we got nearer to our week coming to a close, I couldn’t help but wonder what my next few months were going to be like without Wendy by my side as she was scheduled to fly back to the Twin Cities to complete her college studies at Gustavus Adolphus College in St. Peter, MN.  Then, as we got to within a day of her departure she woke up out of bed with this look like she had been crying in her sleep and when I asked her what was the matter? Wendy told me that she didn’t want to leave me? And then I leaned over with a facial expression that resembled a child opening up presents on Christmas morning and said to her excitedly that “Well I don’t want you to go!” So the next step was convincing her parents that she was going to delay her final college semester and stay with me! But her Mom already knew that as “she kept hinting to her daughter to pack for the long term” when she was picking out clothes for the trip out to visit me! Wendy and I have woken up together every single day since that date of February 13, 1982 which now amounts to 11,380 days!

We started to plan out our wedding date and looked over my Capitals’ hockey schedule so that there were no conflicts (and yes, my bride-to-be was baptized into the life of living by a sports team schedule right from the beginning!) We both agreed on the date of Saturday, June 12th. Next biggest question in my mind was the subject of “best man?”  I knew I was going to disappoint someone no matter who was to be the choice? So I though since we met in an unusual way why not break the normal protocol for a wedding and have “3” Best Men? They were going to be Roger Crozier, who was my first Big League boss and mentor; Bob Strumm, my Junior Hockey boss from Billings, MT and Regina, Canada and the person who brought me into the sports world; and Bryan Murray, the head coach of the Hershey (PA) Bears, our Capitals top farm system club and coach of my Regina team. All three of us had one thing in common: we were hired by Roger Crozier! In time, Bryan would soon become the head coach of the Capitals!
 
The city of Shawville, Quebec, Canada took away our proposed wedding date when they chose to have a special “Bryan Murray Day” for their native son on June 12th. So to make sure Wendy & I could have Bryan with us at the wedding, we moved our date one week ahead to Friday, June 18, 1982.

Next Wendy and I had to decide how and where we were going to hold the actual ceremony? We knew that it would be difficult for both families being so spread throughout the country? We talked it through and felt it would be best to get married at the Upper Marlboro, Maryland courthouse. We both felt married already so spending thousands of dollars just to say we had a splashy reception and church wedding someday just didn’t feel right to the two of us. We invited our families, of course, some close friends of mine and the Capitals’ hockey players and administrative staff.

Roger surprised me at the office this one day during our weekly meetings. He told me that he and his wife, Janice, wanted to make sure Wendy & I had the Wedding of all weddings and as his gift, he was going to take care of the reception. It was going to be on him!! He recommended – and we agreed on - a gorgeous restaurant called Michaels that had fabulous accommodations for special occasions. I was touched beyond belief!! As well, my sister, Pat, told me that her husband, Mark – an aspiring photographer, was going to shoot the ceremony and reception and provide us with a special wedding album as their gift!  

Pat, Mark and my Mom (Camille), drove in from Massachusetts for the wedding. My Dad (Carl) and his wife, Mary, came in from Fort Dodge, Iowa (my actual birth place). Wendy’s Mom (Bette) and her brother, Michael, made the same long drive from Minneapolis. We had both Mom’s, Pat, Mark and Michael bunk in at our apartment the night before the wedding.  My Dad booked a hotel room nearby. It was such a spectacle – families of both sides meeting the bride-to-be and groom-to-be for the very first time! It was kind of like … “Well, everyone, here we are!” 

After we broke the ice with the most important people in our lives, next up was waiting for the arrival of my THREE WISEMEN – Roger, Bob and Bryan. In the dark, late at night, they were trying to find our apartment. We could hear dogs barking outside, fence gates opening up and closing with much noise and then there was this big knock at the door followed by a loud rendition of … JIMMY, JIMMMY, JIMMMMMMY BOYYY!!!!! I knew they had arrived! And there was Roger being Roger with his chant of “Jimmy Boy!” I just loved that man!! This was also the first time I had seen Bob and Bryan since leaving Regina two years ago so this was an emotional moment and reunion for me. And then I had the honor of introducing Wendy to everyone and she getting to know the people that made me who I am! Yes, it was emotional and never to be forgotten night!!

The wedding was beautiful even though it had the courthouse as a setting. I know the building officials working inside were not ready for the flood of people walking in through the doors and the metal detectors going beserk! I can still picture this entire ceremony in my head. The room was so crammed with our friends. We officially became man-and-wife! She became Mrs. Wendy Loria! Yes, the three Best Men stood in there and vouched for Wendy & I as a couple when the judge asked if anyone had any words to say? Then it was off to Michaels Restaurant! Still to this date, I think of Roger and how excited he was for Wendy & I and to make sure that we had a day to always remember! And who will forget that Roger’s baby daughter, Brooke Crozier, took her very first walking steps at our wedding reception? And now, she is all grown up and a Facebook friend to me!   

We split up our honeymoon into two separate trips. The first was spent driving to Minneapolis after the ceremony to meet Wendy’s side of the family. Her Mom had a few household parties and receptions for us. I know my wife will chime in after reading this piece to kill me over the fact that I bought a commemorative ash tray with every state’s insignia from Maryland-to-Minnesota enroute!! Our Honeymoon would continue on in the next month when we traveled to Massachusetts to have Wendy meet my family. We also took time away by ourselves to vacation in beautiful Martha’s Vineyard out in Cape Cod, which was just minutes away from my hometown. We had such an amazing time on that trip!

After the wedding, we welcomed the news that Wendy was expecting and that we were going to become a family in our first year of married life!  We both were super excited and looking forward to our new addition! And then came one of the worst days of my life when Roger called me up (I was at home for lunch at the time) and asked me to meet him right away at a McDonald’s Restaurant not too far from our apartment. I will never forget the date (August 27, 1982) and the news! Roger told me that Abe Pollin had dismissed him from his job as the Capitals’ Interim General Manager. It was so shocking to me! I felt like my Dad just passed away? Roger was brave through it all and said to me before leaving: “Jimmy Boy, take good care of Wendy and no matter what ever happens in your career, always put her first and not your job!” He told me that he was going to go home now and do the same with Janice, his wife, whom he always referred to as “Lightning!”

One of my biggest regrets even to this day came a few months afterwards when Roger called me on the telephone to tell me that he was accepting a position at MBNA Bank in Delaware. They were the world’s largest independent credit card issuers. Roger wanted me to come with him and be his right-hand man! I thought about it. Discussed it with Wendy. But my heart knew that sports was my life. My happiness. I just couldn’t give it up at that time. Roger eventually grew into becoming the bank’s Executive Vice President in charge of worldwide facilities and construction. He was that talented and creative of a man! Unfortunately, his life ended prematurely years later when he passed away in 1996 at the age of 53 due to pancreatic cancer and other complications. Today, the NHL has honored Roger’s memory with an annual league award of his very own called the “Roger Crozier Saving Grace Award” that is presented to the goaltender that compiles the “best overall saves percentage”. What is so touching is that Roger’s award is sponsored by his friends at MBNA Bank and Master Card!

Continued tomorrow …

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